is SKV (Ed: we have suppressed name for special reasons). When you see anybody always say Good morning no
matter that time is night or afternoon because when we say good morning that
time freshness comes from us that also freshens everybody – but that is not today’s
stammer. But upto adult age I was thinking that since I was beaten by my mother
in childhood, for that reason I stammer. But now I dont think that is a major
reason. In school time also the time was very tough for me because in school
there are lots of reason- the students teased me. One was- I stammered, other was I was too thin; so students teased me. My name is shailender so students
tease me for cylinder and calendar. One slogan I still remember : “Iska naam to
cylinder ye chala kitchen ke andar”! That slogan I listened from boys around 20
times daily in school. A time came when I hated to go to school. I was also not able to concentrate on study. I
was average student in school.
school after getting 33% marks. Not a good percentage for admission in any college. I was
happy also because I feared ragging. Again I am going off the track, So in B.
Com I was not able to complete because of Economics. Then I joined BSc IT. In
that period,I also joined an English speaking course. In that course I think
I performed very well. Even I lost my stammering in the classes. There is a group
of 30 to 40 and we did daily debates. Among 30 students except one, none else could
beat me in debate and in 30 students only I was stammerer! I also noticed that
after completing that course my stammering also was lost but after some time It returned.
join a speech therapy from a clinic nearby my house. They charged 300/- per
class in 2001. They charged even on that first day when I went there just for details!
He said – I am doctor and that is a consultation fees which you have to pay! But
that time money was no constraint. The techniques which he was teaching was “pausing”. I
was practicing but not able to use it in front of a stranger. I did most on my practice in my house when I was alone. But
after a period of time I left that.
had to do a viva in which we had to perform a topic on stage and all the
teachers and viva students sat in audience. My madam (teacher) suggested to me that if I did not like to perform then she will give me half marks but she preferred that I should
perform. Then I prepared. I did very well except 2-3 blocks in question answer
round. I was very good in all viva and I also get good numbers.
tried lots of companies for jobs. But did not get good response. I could not get even an interview call. I went around about 1000 companies/consultants but was not
able to crack a job. In
2008 I got a job from my papa’s reference in a MNC’s. That was a golden period
of my time. I enjoyed lots and made first time some friends.
At that time I also interacted with girls for the first time- because I had studied in boys
school (Non co-ed) so we not comfortable to interaction with girls. In that
time I was able to deal with the fear of talking with girls. I made some friends among girls first time in life at that time. But after 1 year and 3 months I was
fired because of some politics.
speaking course that helped me a lot in stammering. They practised some
exercises in English, the same exercises I saw in Delhi SHG group like we have to
interact in metro with someone with a topic in English; there, our teachers
use to help us to do it etc I did around 4-5 month continuously that course; my
instructor helped me even after completing that course. At that time I got married. I was able to control my stammering with my fiancé.
But after my marriage that institute closed and slowly my stammering returned.
got a job in a manufacturing company. That was starting of my Accountancy
career. I was good there. But there was lots of abusive language whole day around and lots of loud noises everywhere. That affected my stammering. The working environment
also not friendly there. Then from my papa’s reference I got a job in a trading
without me; you got 4 jobs, all from my reference”. That I also accepted.
Because I tried lots, but did not get a job in 8 years after completing 12th. That company was very good- just opposite of my last company. Work environment was very friendly.
Staff was also very supportive. Now I was father of a daughter! At that time I started thinking about curing my stammering. For this I started a speech therapy from Fortis
Hospital. Here I was giving Rs 600/- per visit to a speech therapist. I admired
the work of speech therapist. But fault was mine (Edior: really?) that I was not able to apply those
techniques in public. I was even recording when I did practicing or when
I did not. But cure not happened because I was doing practice only in my home
or in office where only 5-6 people worked, of whom I interacted with only 2-3 persons.
say that I was good in telephonic speaking because no one was watching us and I often did
chat on phone around 1 hour to a single person. I cracked even lots
of insurance in telephonic conversations. I was also doing interview on regular basis
for practice and first time in life I cracked an interview- means I got a job without
my papa’s reference and the interviewer was also ready to take me happily. I work
there for one year and he fired me for some work issue. I got one month
salary advance. Now I had no job. I was not able talk to my family about it. Daily
I left my home with Tiffin for office and went for interviews.
around 70 interviews to companies and consultants for a job. When I had no
interview, that time I stayed in my friend’s house. After 15 days I told the truth to my
dad, on mobile phone, that I was jobless since 15 days. My family understood me and did not talk much
about it at that time. But later I got some rough lines about it.
joined LIC of India as suggested by my father because he is also doing that
from many years and his dream was that I succeed in LIC agency. But I don’t know
now since I have completed 15 years in LIC agency but am not able to perform – in my opinion. I am a
gold medalist in LIC agency but I can say that all the work is done by my father.
That does not mean that I have not tried. I have given hundreds of presentation of
insurance but not a good presentation, I think. I don’t know- when I try to sell a policy,
my stammering reaches on worst. Even to my family members or friends where I
do stammer very less. I also did some policies around I can say 5 % but some
are of efforts and some are of luck. I not want to say much because It will become
lengthy – like, take an example: In my BSc IT course I tried all the people to
sell a policy to many students, receptionist, different teachers, accountant,
manager, engineer etc but no one take it but a peon take it from front, I not
try to sell him. He demanded from front.
to my family – I dont like to do LIC work because of my stammering. I want to quit but
now after joining TISA, I am again thinking to do a fresh start in LIC and
want to do extra ordinary!! My dream is: I want to do a MDRT in LIC from my own
efforts. MDRT is Million Dollar Round Table mean any person earned 8,45,300 in
a year by fresh policies then they give you a trip to USA for a conference
(after charging some money).