I too am still learning it.. :)) Not given up yet!
Why is it so difficult? If we listen to this answer given by Eckhart, about acceptance, it might help. He is talking about acceptance in a much bigger dimension: and it has a relevance to our case too.
Acceptance does not come till you are truly ready: that is: True acceptance does not come till we have tried everything, till we have practiced techniques year after year, downloaded and read billions of pdf books; spent LOTS of money, attended many programs – and still FAILED.
Only then a true spirit of surrender comes over us; Only then, we are truly willing to accept- this moment as it is, without reacting to it. Then, we are able to say: Yes, I stammered at this moment, so what? – and carry on to the next word, without batting an eyelid. This is what happens in spiritual life too- of what Eckhart is talking here.
So what happens after this kind of surrender and acceptance? The miracle. You are no more fighting against yourself. Remember: stammering is what you do, in order not to stammer. Secondary and junk behavior – dissolves. You communicate a lot better, as a result – and are free to LIVE at last. What else could matter? God willing, this attitude may transfer to other areas in life: spiritual search. Then, years later, you may say- oh, it was a blessing after all..