how to desensitize yourself ??

I am feeling quite open about stammering now. and i am talking very well with other pws by using bouncing and other techniques . Believe me, there is no inner struggle when I talking to my pws friends. They all says that you have become a non-stutter now. I feel very happy when they said so. When i talk to anyone on the phone then i looked myself in mirror( i have brought a little large mirror only for this purpose). so that i can see where the pressure and the stammering lies on my face. so when i talk to my pws friends, i talk very well and use bouncing very gently. but when i talk to non-pws and watched my self in mirror, find that there is great unexpected facial expression and blocks appears on the face. still i use little bouncing with the non-pws , but sometime i cant use bouncing even if i wanted to use it. i stuck on the first sound of the word that i use to bounce. lets see what funny happen with me today:
Today i was talking to my old friend on the phone. “hello” is horrible word for me. but now i use this word with bouncing like “h h hello” and seems it is no more horrible with bouncing. i use bounce on this word with my friend and conversation going very well. in the middle, i have to say “please hold one minute” after few minutes, i came back and again have to say “hello i am here” but this time , i cant speak this word out. even i try to bounce on this word but nothing work. after few silent minutes on the phone, i end the call. I thought what happens to me. i was more feared now. But i again make call to this friend and complete the conversation somehow. this thing makes my mood off. i know this is not a good thing for a stammerer. we must be desensitize our self to such relapses, but i want to know how to became desensitize if such relapses occurs. All comments are welcomed .

4 Comments

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  1. admin 8 years ago

    Umesh, don't u feel it OK to feel bad once in a while about your stammer! After all we have lived our life in a certain way for a long time and u can't change those deep rooted pattern in one go! You are doing great by bouncing on purpose and slowly u will be more comfortable with your stammer! But till then take this also a part of your life and ACCEPT that sometimes u will feel bad about your stammer and IT IS OK TO FEEL BAD but then don't hang on to it. Just move to the next moment!

  2. Vaibhav T 8 years ago

    Dear Umesh

    Today you are feeling bad but tomorrow you will find that you are doing good.It's part of life.You have grt resources in the form of good memories when you spoke well.Use when you feel bad.

    My wishes with you.

    TC

  3. admin 8 years ago

    thanks guys for your precious advices. it is always feeling nice when i write something here and you guys action immediately .

  4. admin 8 years ago

    The thing that I appreciate is that you called your friend again,inspite of the fear.You didnt let your stammer control you and did what you wanted to do.I think you should feel happy for yourself and not sad !!!!!

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