Marriage on mind?

Recently there was a discussion about marriage: Should a pws tell? Abhinav from Banglore SHG has shared his thoughts, (Ed)

Last night I was going through Indian PWS mail chain in which one member from TISA family raised his concerns about marriage

I
read the entire chain and was shocked to see some of the responses like
girls only look for money, if you have money no body cares about your
stammering.
All these are false perspectives to
console yourself about your perfect imperfections. Marriage is the very
pious relationship in which two imperfect souls come together to live
their life in meaningful and peaceful way. Every relationship demands
patience, trust, mutual understanding and personal space. Stammering is
just one part of our life and it is true that it affects us in mental,
emotional and social level. If you think you can give your 100% to this
relationship then you should talk to girl and her parents and come to
the point of how you are living your life in spite of facing all the
challenges. If girl and her parents are sensible, they will understand
the issue and will take best possible decision for their daughter. 
In
our Indian society, marriage has been considered as ritual. It is true
that every one has physical, emotional, social and economical needs and
that is why most of us decide to do marriage as it is the relation which
is suppose to serve all these needs.  I strongly believe getting
married should be the personal and conscious decision, rather than
family decision. You must be 100% sure that you want to be in this
relationship as there is no going back. Getting married and bringing one
more kid in this world is a huge responsibility and upbringing a child
is minimum 20 years project. If you think that you can take this
responsibility in best possible way and your urges are really strong
than only you should take this decision. 
Regarding
stammering issue in marriage, marriages in Indian society are hypocrisy
and ritual to the core, Every one needs perfect life partner, but no
one knows the definition of perfect life partner. It has become more
like a showoff and business for families rather than really caring about
needs of their daughter and son when it comes to marriage. Every one is
going towards the same rat race of doing engineering, then MBA, 7 or 8
digit salary in MNC, home loan for 20 years.  Of course 7 digits salary
and job in MNC may bring some comforts in your married life, but in the
end it depends only on guy and girl if they can accept each other with
all their perfect imperfections and give 100% to this pious conjugal to
sustain it effortlessly.
It must be your
conscious decision to get married, not  because of family. If you think
you are ready for marriage, then talk to girl directly ..no mumbo jumbo.
Explain her your shortcomings, discuss her shortcomings and see if both
of you would like to be together for rest of your life. Your life will
become miserable if you will not present true picture of your
shortcomings to prospective bride as she may perceive your challenges
differently. Please be honest with her.
Most of
us in TISA family are in the same age group considered suitable for
marriage. Almost every one has same question of stammering running in
background when it comes to marriage. Acceptance is the very deep
concept and it requires a lot of hard work and dedication to make it
deeply rooted in our mind. Until we will truly embrace the acceptance
concept in deep of our mind, not many things will change for us and this
deeply rooted negativity will sustain forever. This self created
negativity must go before entering into marriage. Hope you will lead a
meaningful life with this pious conjugal and all the best for your soul
mate search.
2 Comments

Comments are closed.

  1. admin 4 years ago

    Sachin sir, i totally agree with you. Negativiting must go and acceptance is very important….

  2. Reuben Lopes 4 years ago

    Well said…… Marriage is a life-long project

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