I realised this today, when I was trying to convince my dad about a certain critical advice tendered by me. What was important for me at that time, was, to convince him, rather than the way I was talking. The blocks, the repeated murmur of syllables nothing mattered. What I wanted then was to just convince my dad, (which I obviously did) and when amidst the conversation this thought cropped in my mind, ‘dude you are having your blocks!’. To this my mind replied, ‘it doesn’t matter‘. After that, what happened was, unbelievable. Instead of having several more blocks (progressing into chain effect), it turned out to be one of my most convincing conversation, I ever had with my dad.
There was a similar incident a couple of months ago. It was a normal day at office when I was suddenly asked to give an orientation lecture to a group of college student about what we do in our department and how we contribute to the organisation. It was a 10 min prior notice to lecture them, and me being typical Mohit tried to escape out of the situation. But, when I finally couldn’t avert that responsibility, what I did was, I told myself, ‘good or bad you have to do this and it doesn’t matter how you are going to do this, the point is you have to do this, so better start recollecting things that you will be saying’ and suddenly the panic of giving the orientation lecture withdrew, I started collecting broad points on which I was supposed to speak, and in no time I was there giving them that lecture with more confidence than what I have ever professed in public speaking. It went more smoothly than what I had expected, the reason being, I didn’t put much thought into what is not in my control (my stammer) but rather what is in my control, i.e the content that I spoke about. That is what I did today, in that conversation with my father. It seems like good signs onto this never ending road to perfection.
Kudos to my approach of pushing myself in every dimensions. Some way or the it has been helping me in becoming a better, more confident and a more knowledgeable person with or without stammering.