I have not been very regular in writing about our SHG meetings here at Herbertpur. But it is happening. Last Sunday, V came, with his father. As they came, father shared with me his worries about the youngster. In fact, it was more like a rant and I could feel V’s discomfort. Later, when we were alone we talked about it- like two grown up friends. But before that- I enquired about his upcoming exams. V spoke very frankly and I immediately got the clue: I am good at maths- so I keep on doing maths. I dont understand science, so I dont study it.
Well, that is what most of us do- we stay in our comfort zone and prepare grand plans to conquer the world. No wonder, nothing much happens! As one author said: To make your dreams come true, FIRST thing you must do, is to stop dreaming and get up!
But few of us have that capacity. So, life in all its kindness, sends some rude reminders to us every few years or so: wake up call! We call them “bad experience” but after some years, we are able to see beyond our emotional reactions- and realise the good that came out of it. Physical illnesses too sometimes act as a big stimulus for change.
Anyway, V and I had a nice little walk, lasting about an hour, in the tea gardens; we chatted. Mostly V talked and I listened- attentively; Asking an occasional question here and there, to clarify something.
When young people talk, they are able to reflect on what they are describing. In the process of narration, they shape their self-concept, make sense of what they did a few days back and why, and their brain, on the whole is able to “integrate” and digest their experiences.
So, why dont young people talk? Simple- no one wants to LISTEN to them. Everyone wants to give them truck loads of advice instead.. 🙂
Well, that is what most of us do- we stay in our comfort zone and prepare grand plans to conquer the world. No wonder, nothing much happens! As one author said: To make your dreams come true, FIRST thing you must do, is to stop dreaming and get up!
But few of us have that capacity. So, life in all its kindness, sends some rude reminders to us every few years or so: wake up call! We call them “bad experience” but after some years, we are able to see beyond our emotional reactions- and realise the good that came out of it. Physical illnesses too sometimes act as a big stimulus for change.
Anyway, V and I had a nice little walk, lasting about an hour, in the tea gardens; we chatted. Mostly V talked and I listened- attentively; Asking an occasional question here and there, to clarify something.
When young people talk, they are able to reflect on what they are describing. In the process of narration, they shape their self-concept, make sense of what they did a few days back and why, and their brain, on the whole is able to “integrate” and digest their experiences.
So, why dont young people talk? Simple- no one wants to LISTEN to them. Everyone wants to give them truck loads of advice instead.. 🙂
4 thoughts on “A walk in the tea garden..”
admin
(January 6, 2014 - 7:33 pm)sahi kaha sir aapne..
admin
(January 7, 2014 - 1:36 am)You are right Sachin. Elders particularly parents won't listen youngsters speech. But I used to. Thanks for the good post.
Sachin
(January 7, 2014 - 3:24 am)Thanks Amit and Mani..
In recent Delhi elections, people who listened, seem to have won.. That again proves- listening is more important than speaking.. But it is is so easy to forget!
admin
(January 8, 2014 - 5:21 am)Nicely written Sachin,
I hope u listened attentively when I had such conversations with u, INNUMERABLE amount of times!! :0
Thank you.
Kushal.
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